Sunday, 29 January 2012

“Using no way as a way....” ― Bruce Lee, Tao of Jeet Kune Do

No one can deny the skills and the legacy that was left by Bruce Lee. Aside from the fact that he was a phenomenal martial artist he was a wise soul for his young years.

Many often wondered how he achieved the skills and fame he did. A small chinese boy from Hong Kong, became a larger than life superstar worldwide. No Asian man before or since has touched the entertainment world like he did right?

The thing is, this man had so much self belief that he felt he was limitless. I mean look at the image above. At a mere 5'7" he is jump kicking a man of 7'4" in the head and it does not look like he is having much difficulty either. I wonder how many people could actually do that today?

The way I choose to conduct myself has influences from many people. Many experiences and many things. I think a lot (some say too much). Nevertheless I am at a juncture where I am deciding how to continue to make a living in a fashion conducive to my needs and desires. I am seeking to find what makes me feel passionate and to work that into my life in a beneficial way.

Often times we want to do something or be someone that we think goes against the grain. We fear failure and we limit ourselves because of negative self beliefs or being discouraged by others.

You know what? The only limitations we have are the limitations we set ourselves. No, we all cannot be infamous martial artists and we do not all want to be, but can you imagine if more people thought like he did? As he said '...having no limitation as limitation.'

I must admit I have grown up with that mind set for the most part, and have achieved everything I have prayed for with sheer determination. I guess lately I have forgotten or something? As when I have hit obstacles recently, I began to question myself. Thinking about Bruce Lee and his philosophies for living his life has kicked me back into shape (pardon the pun).

As time swiftly passes I have no room for doubt, or self inflicted limitations. Once again I am walking on the path where I am 'using no way, as way..'


Tuesday, 24 January 2012

Make An Effort!

How many of you take care to ensure that you always look good? Not enough of us do at times in my opinion.

We are either too lazy or too busy. We use excuses like we do not want to come across as vain, or as if we are using our looks when we should be using our brains. Frankly I think not ensuring you look good shows a lack of care and is a reflection of how you feel about yourself. You look frumpy because you feel it. You look fabulous because you know you are.

Looking less than your best on a give day even if you are one of those characters that does not care what other people think, is just not cool. It does not have to be for anyone else either, do it for yourself. Ask yourself, the way you choose to look, does it have you smiling an 'I like what I see smile?'

We all tend to make an effort for special occasions, but why wait for a special occasion? Look good now.

Living in Asia, I am surrounded by women that grow up with the mindset of using their looks to get what they want. I am not saying this is right necessarily, however it has made me realise that we become too complacent and stop bothering.

There are far too many expat wives that adopt the tired used up look, wearing worn out old clothes, the same hairstyle they have for decades and just do not make an effort. Then a cute looking little thing comes along, and steals their husband. She is not necessarily smarter, sometimes she is not even better looking, she just makes more of an effort.

Yes I know just how hard it can be to do all we have to do and look good too but it can be done!

For my part I ensure that I never leave home looking mediocre. Fixing my hair, and wearing something decent is worth the effort it takes. I do it for myself as when you look good you feel good. A bright coloured cute outfit that you know fits well can chase the blues away in an instant - try it!

For sure it is easy to drag yourself out of bed, drag some unkempt clothes on and look disheveled. Nevertheless, you should make an effort. Present yourself in a way that reflects self love, self respect and self awareness. Buy a decent bra, keep those girls up. Buy nice underwear, a nice pair of panties feels so much nicer than granny drawers.

Style your hair, buy clothes that fit, wear comfortable heels - yes they do exist (I will be selling mine soon so watch this space).

We all have our own interpretations of what looks good, that goes without saying! However as long as your reflection makes you smile, you're on the right track! Go forth and look great. Please, make an effort!


Wednesday, 18 January 2012

Give Back!

How many of us think about giving as much as we expect to receive?

I love to give gifts, the joy on the recipients face, their appreciation, and knowing I have made them happy fills me with joy.

What I have noticed though, is that many of us prefer to be the recipient. Do not get me wrong, I like to receive gifts just as much as anyone else, and opening a thoughtful gift from someone is great. Nevertheless I do prefer to give. 

I think this should be your year of giving! It does not have to always be presents either.  Donate a smile, or a compliment.  Encouraging others and giving words of comfort.  Lending a listening ear, volunteering your time.  These are all gifts that demonstrate the ability to do for others.  It is also a quick fix when you are feeling down as it removes focus from yourself and enables you to concentrate on someone else. 

So why not make a concerted effort now as opposed to Christmas time. Empty your wardrobe of unwanted clothes and donate them to the needy. Spring clean your children's toy boxes and let the unused toys go to a useful place.  Teach a skill to someone that would benefit. You could even go to your child's school and read perhaps.

We should try to help someone else weekly.  Give back as there is always someone that deserves it!

This even works for those of us that prefer to receive than to give as what we give always comes back to us in some way or another!


Sunday, 15 January 2012

Loose Lips Sink Ships

I am reknown for speaking my mind and being frank. I totally pride myself in maintaining a disposition that is honest.  However I have realised that Loose lips sink ships.  This is a war time warning that was given to soldiers to highlight that if you talk too much, it could cost lives.  This week I really felt the true meaning of this statement, and that what you say can have unwanted repercussions.  

I have a colleague that is an extremely challenging person to work with.  In saying that, I was the only one that he spoke to, I was the only one that he went to lunch with.  Nevertheless, I felt that would only remain that way if we didn't have to work on a Project together.  I am not the only person that deems interacting with him to be an arduous chore.  In fact, the entire team finds his approach to be cantankerous and unfortunately no one in the team wants to work with him.

As year end reviews approached, my Manager asked me my aspirations. I expressed the type of Projects that I would like to work on as well as the preference that I was not assigned any Projects that would involve too much interaction with Mr Challenging. Suffice to say since then, Mr Challenging no longer speaks to me (the betrayal of my manager does not even warrant me being upset about as if I had not said anything he or his manager would not have revealed my concerns to Mr Challenging as was clearly the case).

On Friday afternoon, my Manager, bouncing with enthusiasm, asked me not to leave before he spoke me.  I knew it was coming as I am a strong believer in what you resists persists.  To cut a long story short, he said that not only would I be working with Mr Challenging on my next Project, but the Programme would last for well over a year - much to my chagrin!!

He then had the audacity to ask me if I was happy.  I said 'NO!'  - Being the honest person that I am.  In saying that, I omitted to say why, as the notion that 'Loose Lips Sink Ships' came to mind.  Suffice to say, I was annoyed.  I felt disappointed that my Manager in asking me what I wanted a few weeks earlier, had deliberately gone against my wishes by committing me to a sentence of over a year.

However you know what? I am not one to suffer fools gladly (foolishness really irritates me).  I certainly do not buy into the victim mentality.  Therefore I have decided to accept the challenge of working with Mr Challenging with gusto!  Doing anything less would result in an epic failure.  Failure to demonstrate professionalism, failure to prove to myself that I can overcome any challenge, and failure to be the best that I can be. 

God works in mysterious ways and I know that this is an opportunity.  I have yet to figure out what the opportunity is, nevertheless I will smile the biggest smile with this person, I will cooperate, and see the good side of him for there must be one.

What I have come to realise is that without a doubt, honesty is the best policy, in saying that, one must apply it with deep thought, and consideration of the fallout, as loose lips really do sink ships.


Thursday, 12 January 2012

Appreciate Good People!

The most important thing that I learnt last year was that we should be prudent about the people we surround ourselves with.  That goes for friends, family, colleagues, partners - everyone.

There are some people that are in our lives by default, circumstance, history, and so many other reasons.  There are others that we have made a conscious decision to have in our lives and then there are those that we cannot even remember why we have them around.

What I know to be true is that the type of people that you choose to have in your life should inspire you, genuinely care about you, and provide you with love, comfort and support

Above all, when we have these good people in our lives - we should appreciate it! Open yourself to being there for others and allow good people in. When they are there for you, never take it for granted.  Question yourself, are you showing these people how important they are to you?  Do you take advantage of them instead of taking opportunities to help them?  Do you regularly thank them and be there for them?

When we are fortunate to have 'Good People' around it is truly a blessing.  Below are pictures of those that as I write, are here for me from near and far.  They inspire me, comfort me, put up with me in good times and bad, support me and love me. They have empowered me to be a better person.  They provide encouragement, objectivity, great experiences, love and understanding.   A shoulder to cry on, a forum to be heard and warm hearts.

Each one has played a part in who I am at this moment, one happy lady who feels a whole lot of love from:
  • KC - The Challenger.
  • Mum - Unconditional love giver.
  • Little Bro - The Best Supportive Father figure.
  • Little Sis - With the Gorgeous Heart.
  • Honey - Who Makes me feel special.
  • Aunty - That Unceasingly cares for us.
  • My Beautiful Sisters - Towers of Strength. 
I appreciate and love you all.  You are such Good People! 

Tuesday, 10 January 2012

We can be anything we want...

HAPPY NEW YEAR My People!! Have missed you.

Yes I know, it has been a minute since I have written. I have had a well deserved break. I have set my key goals for 2012 and I am ready to rock and roll.

This year for me is all about exceeding expectations. You see I have often set achievable goals and achieve them for the most part. It is more gratifying than setting higher expectations and not succeeding in achieving them exactly the way one hoped to, right? Wrong!  Thus, this year I decided - why not set goals that have you reaching for the sky?!!

As a youngster back in the 70s, I remember watching the fantastic kids musical Bugsy Malone. It was great seeing the likes of Jodie Foster et al, pretending to be adults and re-enacting adult interactions.
I recommend it as a fun film to view with the kids. Nevertheless the ending theme of unity and knowing - 'we coulda been anything that we wanted to be' will resonate with me forever.

In keeping with the latter theme (I think unity warrants it's own post), let's reflect on being anything we want.

Do you think you can be whatever you desire?   How is it that as children we have so much faith in our abilities? We aspire to be Pilots, Astronauts, Doctors, Musicians, and so many other things.  We all know of someone that has dived from some ridiculous height as a crazy kid (usually the males) in a bid to prove they can fly, and they really believe as such. I certainly can recall more than one man that can attest to that.

Unfortunately, age occurs and then we become the catalysts of fear based behaviour. Cautious, unwilling to try, and at times, downright scared to fail! When does this happen? Why does it happen?

I know for me, historically I have set goals that are comfortable enough to give room for procrastination and error. What is that about?

Today why not do things differently just because you can? I am not talking about fake new years' resolutions that die a quick death next week. I am talking about objectives that make a difference to you and others.

Come on, be an example to others and demonstrate that it starts with a mind set. Don't make it an onerous task either. Keep it simple: Add a bit of determination, inject some motivation, mix in a shot of never give up, a dose of keep trying and it makes for a beautiful cocktail of achieving what you believe in!

I know so many of us have exponential amounts of abilities. We all let fear lead the way at times but it's time to handle your Business. Handle it!

My People, heed my pleas. Be anything you want to be! I know I will.